Right now I am sitting at my desk at work, with a lamp shade on my head. Seriously. Take it in.
I am a tube of toothpaste for our Halloween celebration! And the shade is my cap! Loooove it.
I just cannot wait until it is four o'clock and I can leave and head out to see my hunny bunny. He is making me dinner tonight (a little Shake-n-Bake action going on) and I'm so excited to snuggle in the new bed (that I haven't had a chance to try out yet) and just relax.
Then, bright and early tomorrow morning, I am heading out the rest of the way to my college friend's house for a fun Girls Night. Thuper duper exthited!
Since we were having a fun day at work, I stayed up late to bake some treats last night. I didn't end up getting to bed until 2am, which mean 6:30 came around pretty early this morning. But it should be a pretty relaxed day here at the bank, so hopefully it will be easy and go by quick (and without my over-tired eyeballs falling out of my head).
HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! ::muah-ha-ha-ha-ha::
Enjoy it!!
10.31.2008
10.29.2008
Gah, frustration
My mother and I are in a fight. It is really silly. And stupid and pointless. We used to get along really well.
Since I moved back home after college and especially since we started planning a wedding, we've been butting heads. Mostly because it seems like she is only ever asking me stupid questions. And I'm sure she doesn't mean them to be stupid, but that is how they end up.
And of course, I am not helping the situation, by answering these stupid questions with honest answers. And honestly, sometimes to other people's ears, comes out as bitchy. She also doesn't like the reply "I don't know."
So this morning we are fighting because she got a card for me to send to my goddaughter for Halloween. Sounds harmless, right?
Well, she asked last week if I was sending something to Hayden for Halloween and I said no. Which should have been enough.
**Before you go thinking I am a horrible godmother, Hayden is 5 months old. It seems a little silly to send a Halloween card to her...next year, when she might get excited to have mail, or like to have her own pack of M&Ms, it's another story**
So when she pulled out the card (after I've gotten 5.5 hours of sleep and my immune system is slowing losing a battle to a cold), I was a bit surprised. And told her that it was stupid to send a 5 month old a card. And that I didn't even know what to write. So instead I started packing my lunch.
She snatched the card up and told me "Just go away"....awesome start to the morning.
She has told me several times that 1 - I should have just eloped, 2 - she doesn't even want to come to the wedding anymore and 3 - she hates how I am growing my hair and it looks horrible (which seems silly but is a big deal).
I think we just need to start again.... gosh my eyes are so tired
Since I moved back home after college and especially since we started planning a wedding, we've been butting heads. Mostly because it seems like she is only ever asking me stupid questions. And I'm sure she doesn't mean them to be stupid, but that is how they end up.
And of course, I am not helping the situation, by answering these stupid questions with honest answers. And honestly, sometimes to other people's ears, comes out as bitchy. She also doesn't like the reply "I don't know."
So this morning we are fighting because she got a card for me to send to my goddaughter for Halloween. Sounds harmless, right?
Well, she asked last week if I was sending something to Hayden for Halloween and I said no. Which should have been enough.
**Before you go thinking I am a horrible godmother, Hayden is 5 months old. It seems a little silly to send a Halloween card to her...next year, when she might get excited to have mail, or like to have her own pack of M&Ms, it's another story**
So when she pulled out the card (after I've gotten 5.5 hours of sleep and my immune system is slowing losing a battle to a cold), I was a bit surprised. And told her that it was stupid to send a 5 month old a card. And that I didn't even know what to write. So instead I started packing my lunch.
She snatched the card up and told me "Just go away"....awesome start to the morning.
She has told me several times that 1 - I should have just eloped, 2 - she doesn't even want to come to the wedding anymore and 3 - she hates how I am growing my hair and it looks horrible (which seems silly but is a big deal).
I think we just need to start again.... gosh my eyes are so tired
10.27.2008
Been thinking about it...
Yesterday, my mother, grandfather, little cousin, fiance and I went to a spaghetti dinner at an area high school (yay fundraisers!) - the most random group ever. While we were eating dinner, my little cousin Paul, who is 6 years old (and if he heard this, he would be yelling, "YEAH but I'm ALMOST 7!!) asked me, "Meagan, when did you fall in love with Kevin?"
.....and I didn't have an answer. So I've really been thinking about it, trying to find the moment that I "knew" but I really don't think I have an answer.
Kevin and I met our freshman year of college...in our first class...on the first day. We had matching pencils - blue, with flowers and a girl's name printed on them. He sat next to me and right away, I knew there was *something* about this guy that I liked. He had a relaxed vibe, sort of shy. Four years in an all girls high school didn't teach me much in the way of socializing with guys, so we started talking about our matching pencils and I found out "Jenna" was his high school girlfriend. Right away, my hopes fell.
Kevin was also in my Freshman Seminar, a class that met once a week where we could talk about issues and new situations we were encountering during our first semester. At one point we had to bring in theme songs for ourselves - like a song that would play when we walked into a room in a movie. Mine was Avril Lavinge, "Things I'll Never Say." Cheesy, but I love it. For the most part, it seemed like people were picking songs that fit them. Then Kevin stood up - this 320lb, 6-foot tall guy, and played his song. It was this tiny voice singing, "Am I not pretty enough? Is my heart too broken?" - a song by Kasey Chambers. It was comical, the difference that there was between this big guy, and this tiny song. He doesn't even remember it, but I do. And I went home and downloaded the song.
Once I invited him over to hang out with my friends (because I knew he didn't hang out with a lot of people at school) - we were going through a phase where we watched Old School, every single day. And he really came down, but we weren't there.
Freshman year, Kevin hated our school. He was going home every weekend to see his friends and his girlfriend. I really have that freshman seminar instructor to thank...she befriended him and convinced him to stay at the school.
Sophomore year, he and his girlfriend had broken up. A girlfriend of mine was dating a guy on the football team who wanted to set him up. They decided that my best friend Carolyn was the one. So even though I liked him, even though I was upset about it, I didn't say anything. I thought he had chosen her. Turns out, he thought she liked him and she thought he liked her and really, they didn't like each other that way at all. One night, our whole group of friends went out to the pier and on the way home, Kevin and I got to talking. About country music, of all things. But when we were talking, I found myself thinking, "Wow, this guy is really amazing. We could do this." Even Carolyn saw it, and was encouraging me. But I thought she was just being diplomatic, and we let it die off. ((Kevin remembers this conversation, and really regrets that we didn't let each other know how we were feeling...I just think that what came next really makes us appreciate how good we have it now))
Junior year, Kevin got back together with his old girlfriend. And I started dating, Other Kevin (aka Bad Kevin). We met at a party at the local nerd school, through mutual friends. We fell hard and fast. Looking back, I can only see how I let him control and manipulate me, never wanting me to be anywhere without him, needing to latch on to me. But at the time, I was happy (even though no one around me thought he was worth my time...). Of course there were good time, and many firsts - he was the first "real" boyfriend, the first love, etc.
Senior year I was single again. I would finishing school a semester earlier than my friend and it was ALL about having a good time. But I was lonely, and I still thought about Kevin. One time my roommate and I were talking before bed about Senior Ball and who we would take, and she said, "Well you can take Jimmy Tony (the nickname we had for Kevin)." Of course, I couldn't - he was dating someone. But I still really liked that idea.
The day before he was going back to school, Kevin and the Ex called it quits for good. And Facebook got the word out. My friends were texting me to make sure I had seen the news. I ran downstairs and told my mom, "Jimmy Tony is single and I love him and we're getting married." I guess I've been saying it so long that it seems like it's always been true. It was his roommate's birthday in two weeks, conveniently the weekend that I was planning to go up and visit anyhow. We found out they would be at the bar that we went to every Saturday to celebrate and I formulated a plan.
Kevin is NOT into the club scene and neither was the friend, but they went out anyway. And we saw them there...all my girlfriends wished Sven a happy birthday and we stopped to talk for a minute. Then we headed out to the dance floor. I went by myself to the ladies' room and on the way back, I stopped to talk to him. I said I got seperated from my friends and I couldn't find them. Kevin is tall and could see them out on the floor, dancing. But when I asked him to come out and dance with me, he accepted. He's not a good dancer, but I had SO much fun. The lights came on, but we weren't ready for the night to be over, so he drove home with my friends and I and came back for a beer. We stayed up until 7 am, just talking and sharing stories. And after that, I knew. I knew the way you know about a good melon. (and if you recognize where that is from, you are my new bff.)
So as cheesy as it sounds, I guess I always knew. Like we had been looking for each other all along and just had to wait until the time was right.
So when did you know?
.....and I didn't have an answer. So I've really been thinking about it, trying to find the moment that I "knew" but I really don't think I have an answer.
Kevin and I met our freshman year of college...in our first class...on the first day. We had matching pencils - blue, with flowers and a girl's name printed on them. He sat next to me and right away, I knew there was *something* about this guy that I liked. He had a relaxed vibe, sort of shy. Four years in an all girls high school didn't teach me much in the way of socializing with guys, so we started talking about our matching pencils and I found out "Jenna" was his high school girlfriend. Right away, my hopes fell.
Kevin was also in my Freshman Seminar, a class that met once a week where we could talk about issues and new situations we were encountering during our first semester. At one point we had to bring in theme songs for ourselves - like a song that would play when we walked into a room in a movie. Mine was Avril Lavinge, "Things I'll Never Say." Cheesy, but I love it. For the most part, it seemed like people were picking songs that fit them. Then Kevin stood up - this 320lb, 6-foot tall guy, and played his song. It was this tiny voice singing, "Am I not pretty enough? Is my heart too broken?" - a song by Kasey Chambers. It was comical, the difference that there was between this big guy, and this tiny song. He doesn't even remember it, but I do. And I went home and downloaded the song.
Once I invited him over to hang out with my friends (because I knew he didn't hang out with a lot of people at school) - we were going through a phase where we watched Old School, every single day. And he really came down, but we weren't there.
Freshman year, Kevin hated our school. He was going home every weekend to see his friends and his girlfriend. I really have that freshman seminar instructor to thank...she befriended him and convinced him to stay at the school.
Sophomore year, he and his girlfriend had broken up. A girlfriend of mine was dating a guy on the football team who wanted to set him up. They decided that my best friend Carolyn was the one. So even though I liked him, even though I was upset about it, I didn't say anything. I thought he had chosen her. Turns out, he thought she liked him and she thought he liked her and really, they didn't like each other that way at all. One night, our whole group of friends went out to the pier and on the way home, Kevin and I got to talking. About country music, of all things. But when we were talking, I found myself thinking, "Wow, this guy is really amazing. We could do this." Even Carolyn saw it, and was encouraging me. But I thought she was just being diplomatic, and we let it die off. ((Kevin remembers this conversation, and really regrets that we didn't let each other know how we were feeling...I just think that what came next really makes us appreciate how good we have it now))
Junior year, Kevin got back together with his old girlfriend. And I started dating, Other Kevin (aka Bad Kevin). We met at a party at the local nerd school, through mutual friends. We fell hard and fast. Looking back, I can only see how I let him control and manipulate me, never wanting me to be anywhere without him, needing to latch on to me. But at the time, I was happy (even though no one around me thought he was worth my time...). Of course there were good time, and many firsts - he was the first "real" boyfriend, the first love, etc.
Senior year I was single again. I would finishing school a semester earlier than my friend and it was ALL about having a good time. But I was lonely, and I still thought about Kevin. One time my roommate and I were talking before bed about Senior Ball and who we would take, and she said, "Well you can take Jimmy Tony (the nickname we had for Kevin)." Of course, I couldn't - he was dating someone. But I still really liked that idea.
The day before he was going back to school, Kevin and the Ex called it quits for good. And Facebook got the word out. My friends were texting me to make sure I had seen the news. I ran downstairs and told my mom, "Jimmy Tony is single and I love him and we're getting married." I guess I've been saying it so long that it seems like it's always been true. It was his roommate's birthday in two weeks, conveniently the weekend that I was planning to go up and visit anyhow. We found out they would be at the bar that we went to every Saturday to celebrate and I formulated a plan.
Kevin is NOT into the club scene and neither was the friend, but they went out anyway. And we saw them there...all my girlfriends wished Sven a happy birthday and we stopped to talk for a minute. Then we headed out to the dance floor. I went by myself to the ladies' room and on the way back, I stopped to talk to him. I said I got seperated from my friends and I couldn't find them. Kevin is tall and could see them out on the floor, dancing. But when I asked him to come out and dance with me, he accepted. He's not a good dancer, but I had SO much fun. The lights came on, but we weren't ready for the night to be over, so he drove home with my friends and I and came back for a beer. We stayed up until 7 am, just talking and sharing stories. And after that, I knew. I knew the way you know about a good melon. (and if you recognize where that is from, you are my new bff.)
So as cheesy as it sounds, I guess I always knew. Like we had been looking for each other all along and just had to wait until the time was right.
So when did you know?
10.24.2008
"I like your shoes!"
If you are ever with me, you'd better hope I'm not at a bar when I start telling people I like there shoes. It's a sure-fire signal I am d-runk.
On unfortunate 21st birthday, I was forced to drink mass amounts of booze (seriously...I wasn't buying the drinks...others were practically pouring them down my throat). So, ya know, after beginning the evening with a shot of tequila, followed by a Long Island iced tea, double fisted with a Jack&coke, more tequila, the discovery of red headed sluts, and a girl standing on a bar pouring pucker directly into my mouth....I'd had enough.
There is not much I remember about this birthday (for obvious reasons) but some of the things I do remember are telling people that I liked their shoes.
Shoe victim #1 - they were white sandals and looked amazingly high. I was washing my hands when I said it. Turns out, I was oblivious...she was puking into the sink next to me, and I was trying to compliment her on her stylish footwear
Shoe victim #2 - After I was pulled apart from my ex bf (who I had broken up with the day before, but who still wanted to come out) while we were crying in the middle of the dance floor, my friends decided that maybe we should grab something to eat before we got in their car (quick recap of the rules - #1 NO PUKING IN THE CAR #2 - NO PEEING IN THE CAR....they double-checked that I could remember said rules several times every hour). We were walking to the local drunk stop on the way (i stumbled there, blaming the sidewalk's unevenness for the reason I couldn't walk straight) when I saw them - the most beautiful pink strappy Barbie sandals! I had to tell her I liked them...but she was across the street....on her cell phone...yelling at someone...in Spanish. No bother. I YELLED across the street, "HEY I LIKE YOUR SHOES!" My friends were appalled. She put down her cell phone, looked at her feet and yelled back, "THANKS!" and then continued on her way.
See...we shoe lovers always appreciate a compliment!
Now I am thinking of getting these to wear under my wedding dress...you know, in case any guests start to act up:
Just kidding!!! But seriously, take a look at some of these shoes...apparently they are all the rage in Japan.
I don't know how you could NOT break an ankle in these shoes...but they look pretty cool. Cool enough that I want to give them a try, just to see if I could do it.
Enjoy it!!
10.23.2008
Hello, my name is Meagan...
...and I am a glutton for punishment. I know I can't have a puppy - they aren't allowed in the apartment we have now. I know that even if we *could* have a puppy, I wouldn't have one yet - we are never home and it just isn't fair to leave a little animal alone all the time. But still...
I can't help but look at these sad little eyes, "Puh-puh-puh-please take me home with you"
I used to want a little Yorkie baby like this (which, I still do...I didn't grow up in a house with pets, so something small, preferably whose mouth doesn't come above my knee, would be perfect). But lately, I've been thinking...English bulldog. And I shall name her ::drumroll please::
Angeline.
COME ON, how cute are they? Seriously, my cold dead heart is melting here
Oh man, look at those rolls! And the chubby furry little paws. How could you not want one?
Enjoy it!!
10.22.2008
Eat, Pray, Love
So I just finished another book last night (which makes me feel a little guilty, since I told Kevin, "I think its time for bed" and hung up with him, then stayed up another half hour to read) and I loooooved it.
Seriously, I know there was a lot of hype over this book, at least among my friends, and when I started to read it (in JUNE!), I have to say, I was sort of disappointed. I just couldn't get into it.
Turns out, I'm a little quick to judge. At the time, I was angry with the friend who gave it to me...we were having a little bit of difficulties because she couldn't understand how I could settle down and get married, and not put a trip to Hong Kong on my credit card and spend the next year paying it off...I mean, there is more to it, but that gives you an idea.
So when I started reading about this woman who was going through an awful divorce because she couldn't stand to be a wife anymore, and who decided to take a year off from life and travel to Italy, India and Indonesia, I was a little turned off.
But because my friends loved it so much, I kept reading. Even while I was reading other things, and even though I kept setting this aside, I kept coming back. They told me, "You HAVE to get to Indonesia." And I finally did.
And it was totally worth it, my friends. This book is beautifully written, and just an amazing read. I whole-heartedly recommend it, and if you thought you didn't like it and you set it down, please, try again. For serious.
Up next, another friend favorite that I have been hiding under a rock and avoiding: the Twilight series. In an effort to persuade me to read it, my friend Kelly who was visiting this weekend bought me the first book as a (very) early Christmas present. ((who knew all she would have to do is show me the movie preview! o.h.m.a.n my likey!))
Enjoy it!!
10.20.2008
Another Saturday Night
Saturday night was quite a different story from the shower, so it wouldn't seem right to blog about them in the same post....
Post-shower, Kara followed Kelly and I home and came in to visit for a while. Our feet were aching after standing all afternoon and so it was a welcomed break to sit down and relax. Kevin and his groomsmen (plus his dad) went to get measured for tuxes earlier in the afternoon, so they were all hanging out at his brother's house for the evening.
After a quick stop at the mall, Kelly and I picked up Colleen and headed over there. Kevin's brothers Nate and Randy were there, as were Justin, Justin's wife Heather, Derek, Derek's wife Sara, and Mike (all Kevin's friends) and then some of Nate & his fiance Jennie's friends too. It was a packed house!
When Kevin's friends get together, drunkeness is soon to follow. Kevin brought a bottle of Crown Royal with him, and apparently by the time we got there (at 6:40 pm, mind you) they had finished more than half that bottle and a 30-rack of beer. They're all big guys (and clearly big drinkers) but this was still a bit early to be drinking that much.
The other thing about Kevin's friends is they get into these funny moods when they're drinking. They fight with each other, someone always ends up with no shirt on, someone ends up leaving because they're being cranky. So Justin and Derek were fighting, Mike was ribbing Justin, Kevin's eyes were crossing because he was so drunk and it was a mess.
Mike, this stupid fool that Kevin is friends with, has a tendency to take off after he has been drinking. Not one or two beers mind you, but beers and shots all night and then gets restless and decides he has to go. So he and Derek took off, went to the McDonalds up the road and then had to stay there because there was a sheriff. Derek wasn't even wearing shoes!
The wives and Justin had to go pick them up and wrestle Mike's keys away from him.
Kevin got sick and I had to be all comforting. Then he got all weepy and was like, "You're so good to me, I don't deserve you, blah blah blah" and so he was making me all weepy, because it was so strange to see him like that. Usually when he drinks, he gets all giggly, like a little girl, but only one other time has he gotten upset like that. So its a little unnerving.
Oh, also Justin and my friend Kelly (both very conservative) ended up talking politics with my other friend Colleen (very liberal), so that was a little funny. Justin can get a little heated, so his wife and I kept trying to redirect the conversation, but Colleen was a good sport about it, mostly because she finds it interesting just to have those dialogues with people who see things so differently than she does.
All in all, the evening was a mess.
Kevin called at 2 am, saying he woke up and couldn't get back to bed. I was still being nice to him because he was sick and he had been so upset.
I called him the next morning around 11, planning that I would be able to see him again but apparently he forgot to tell me (since he was drunk) that he was driving his brother home in the morning and so I wouldn't see him. So the whole weekend, I got to spend about 2 hours with him. Awesome.
On the bright side, I finished all 52 of my thank you notes.
Post-shower, Kara followed Kelly and I home and came in to visit for a while. Our feet were aching after standing all afternoon and so it was a welcomed break to sit down and relax. Kevin and his groomsmen (plus his dad) went to get measured for tuxes earlier in the afternoon, so they were all hanging out at his brother's house for the evening.
After a quick stop at the mall, Kelly and I picked up Colleen and headed over there. Kevin's brothers Nate and Randy were there, as were Justin, Justin's wife Heather, Derek, Derek's wife Sara, and Mike (all Kevin's friends) and then some of Nate & his fiance Jennie's friends too. It was a packed house!
When Kevin's friends get together, drunkeness is soon to follow. Kevin brought a bottle of Crown Royal with him, and apparently by the time we got there (at 6:40 pm, mind you) they had finished more than half that bottle and a 30-rack of beer. They're all big guys (and clearly big drinkers) but this was still a bit early to be drinking that much.
The other thing about Kevin's friends is they get into these funny moods when they're drinking. They fight with each other, someone always ends up with no shirt on, someone ends up leaving because they're being cranky. So Justin and Derek were fighting, Mike was ribbing Justin, Kevin's eyes were crossing because he was so drunk and it was a mess.
Mike, this stupid fool that Kevin is friends with, has a tendency to take off after he has been drinking. Not one or two beers mind you, but beers and shots all night and then gets restless and decides he has to go. So he and Derek took off, went to the McDonalds up the road and then had to stay there because there was a sheriff. Derek wasn't even wearing shoes!
The wives and Justin had to go pick them up and wrestle Mike's keys away from him.
Kevin got sick and I had to be all comforting. Then he got all weepy and was like, "You're so good to me, I don't deserve you, blah blah blah" and so he was making me all weepy, because it was so strange to see him like that. Usually when he drinks, he gets all giggly, like a little girl, but only one other time has he gotten upset like that. So its a little unnerving.
Oh, also Justin and my friend Kelly (both very conservative) ended up talking politics with my other friend Colleen (very liberal), so that was a little funny. Justin can get a little heated, so his wife and I kept trying to redirect the conversation, but Colleen was a good sport about it, mostly because she finds it interesting just to have those dialogues with people who see things so differently than she does.
All in all, the evening was a mess.
Kevin called at 2 am, saying he woke up and couldn't get back to bed. I was still being nice to him because he was sick and he had been so upset.
I called him the next morning around 11, planning that I would be able to see him again but apparently he forgot to tell me (since he was drunk) that he was driving his brother home in the morning and so I wouldn't see him. So the whole weekend, I got to spend about 2 hours with him. Awesome.
On the bright side, I finished all 52 of my thank you notes.
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